DRUNKS ARE MORON

Tonight I had to endure a train ride home smelling the sour stench of some lousy drunk's puke. I apologize for sounding so bitter but when you had to endure a 45 minute train ride smelling the contents of someone else's stomach in a confined environment with no roll-down windows, you'd be in a foul mood too.

So to the dumbass who made my train ride earlier a nauseating one, he's a few pointers for you to indicate when you've had a tad too much alcohol...

YOU KNOW YOU HAD TOO MUCH ALCOHOL...

When you can sterilize wounds by sneezing onto it

When your drool evaporates the moment it leaves the corner in your mouth

When you take a crap and your shit comes out sterilized

When you exhale, people think there's an Irish pub nearby

When you cough, chunks of pate drenched in alcohol comes out. And you've never had pate...

When you puke out the chocolate coffee cake you had earlier and out comes tiramisu.

When your pee can be bottled and sold as paint stripper

When you can't hold your puke in while you're on the bloody train...